Gossip Girls (and Boys)

Yesterday, I was catapulted back into junior high.  Low whispers, furtive glances and your typical, run-of-the-mill gossip.  

It started when a co-worker and I walked past the row of "high up" offices.  Despite the closed door, we could still see what was happening through the glass wall.  One of ours was in there.  That is never a good thing.  I thought about teasing my co-worker about his trip to the 'principal's office' later, but when I stopped by his desk, it was vacant.  I check in with a few others to see if he had told them he was leaving early for the day.  Nope.  Car in the parking lot (I can see it from my window).  Nope.  Not good.  

Let the gossip begin.  By the end of the night, after a few phone calls and some texting, I had my answer.  He was gone.  Downsized, if you will.  

This morning, more gossip swirled in the air.  What about [name]?  I hear he got it too.  Yeah, well, I saw [name] with boxes in the parking lot.  Strange.  My phone buzzes in my pocket, "[name] is gone, and we think [name] is next" lights up my screen.  I hastily shove it in the faces of near-by co-workers, heady with the excitement mixed with fear of the unknown, the fear of 'who's next.'

All told, four lives were changed this week.  Which, with the medium size of our company, is not much, but it was people that I knew, really knew.  People who were making lives, making careers.  One was planning a wedding.  Another's baby is due in January. 

As I look at my life, I think, shit, I'm building a house.  What if it had been me?  What would we do?  Just go to the bank and give the money back?  Stop building where we are?  We would be tapped out - completely.  And where would we be?  Living in my MIL's run down house.

It's very scary.  I suddenly feel as though maybe I should care about politics.  Maybe I realized this just a tiny bit too late.