I have a ton of people who are super enthusiastic about my opening a bakery. For that, I will forever be thankful. BUT, I've reached that point.
That point where I've actively been struggling to open this bakery for over five months now. I've been without a job for close to seven months.
I've encountered multiple speed bumps. OK, fine, ONE GIANT SPEED BUMP that is my landlord. Regardless, I wanted to open in September. I didn't really tell him I wanted to open in September, but since we were having this discussion in July, I thought surely a few months wasn't that difficult. We discussed October as the open date (with me secretly thinking September could happen).
They started dragging in drywall back in September. Good sign. "Woo hoo, this thing is going to happen!" I thought.
It didn't. We didn't have a building permit.
That finally happened sometime toward the end of October.
Goodbye Halloween. I didn't want to make any desserts for you anyway.
So I was told that I would get a 'schedule' of when/where/what would take place. (I still don't have that.)
I asked if I could be in by Thanksgiving. I was told 'maybe.' OK, maybe sounds good.
Adios Thanksgiving. I didn't want to make any pies or cakes for you anyway.
So then I said, "CHRISTMAS???? Can I make it by CHRISTMAS???"
Sure! Was the hearty response.
And then I realized that when I say 'Christmas,' I mean "Hi, I need to be open the weeks before Christmas so that I can be providing desserts for all the parties that happen the weekends leading up to Christmas."
But the guys in the bakery working hear, "I need to be open Christmas day, maybe sometime in the afternoon?"
So, no, at this point, I won't be open by Christmas either.
They are lying liars who lie.
Do you know what it's like to not have a job for 7 months? While concurrently dumping what money you do have into a business? Do you know what that's like when you also pile on the fact that some people refuse to pay you? Do you? Do you?
Sorry, didn't mean to start yelling and get all fired up, but I just wanted you to feel the pain that I've been going through.
You're walking through Target, minding your own business, staring at the spatulas and you bump into a well meaning friend that you haven't seen in a month or so. And then they casually ask,
"Hey! How's the bakery coming along!?"
They're excited for me and totally want to come in and buy a cookie once I'm open.
"Clean up on isle seven! Crazy girl just bit her friends head off!"
To say that I've become certifiably insane is an understatement.
So, with that in mind, (if you're still reading) I ask you a small favor. I teeny tiny favor, if you will.
Please don't ask me if the bakery is open. Just don't.
If you love me (or even just like me a little), and you value your life, you won't do it.
When these guys get their shit together and finish my bakery, I'm going to have a party. And not just a grand opening party, I mean a party with booze. (There's a liquor store in my parking lot) I'm going to celebrate. I'm going to shout it from every single social media platform I have access to. Hell, I will join Pintrest and create some kind of crafty poster with cakes and the saying 'My bakery is open Bitches!' and it will be repinned no less that three hundred times. I will call you and say, "Guess what!?!?" (And you will think, 'Thank God, it's about bloody time.') I will post it on my Facebook -both on my page as well as the bakery's page. I will dance around and start harassing you as to why you haven't stopped by yet? and why didn't you order anything? And do you want me to have to sell my house? Do you hate me? Why do you hate me?
So I guess what I'm saying is:
When my bakery is open, you will know.
I promise, you will know.