Bradversation: After dinner edition

Me: Look, Presley scratched my leg this morning and it's been hurting so I pulled up my pant leg and its just a tiny scratch. There's nothing there. (Me laughing at my own stupidity)

Brad: You know what would make that feel better? Getting me Oreos and milk. 

Me: How exactly?

Brad: Well you'll feel it here *motions to his heart* and it will roll down to your legs. 

Me: Right. But you're going to eat all my Oreos! 

Brad: Um, You're looking kinda fat...